Communicating in Co-Writes
When you begin a co-write, you are stepping into a professional environment. Two or more people have decided to set aside their personal time to pen an original song. Recording gear, sound panels, and midi keyboards are all indicators of your working space. It is important for you to think about the ways in which you are interacting with your co-writers to make that space effective, comfortable, and professional. So, let me give you a few tools in order to keep the energy in your co-writes flowing.
Get to know your co-writers. I'm paraphrasing here but Ross Golan, who hosts a podcast called And the Writer Is... in which he interviews hit songwriters, says that his favorite part of each session is getting to know his co-writers during the first hour or so. It is fairly standard to talk about miscellaneous things at the start of a write: industry triumphs, a bad first date, a recent bike purchase, etc. Be kind and listen during this part of a co-write. Getting to know your collaborators will help to create an open energy in the room.
Use positive language. Once you begin the creative process you will encounter some ideas from your co-writers that you love and some that you don't. Giving them positive feedback when they present you with a great idea will help foster a positive environment. When they present you with a less than savory idea, you'll have to navigate that as well. Try to avoid saying things like "no" or "I don't like that." Instead, opt for positive statements like "let's keep searching for the line" or "I wonder if we can top that." Negative statements can make your co-writer feel closed off while positive statements keep them open.
Stay engaged. It can be quite annoying when your co-writer gets distracted by text messages or Instagram. This type of behavior suggests that their work is not important to them. Don't be that co-writer! Experiment with turning off your phone or using software like Cold Turkey to limit your access to distracting websites. Work time is not web time. Unless you're using an online rhyming dictionary then you should switch off your devices.
Send a follow up. Typically, you will know by the end of the co-write whether you want to work with someone again. If you had a great time then send a follow up text or e-mail in the hours after your session. Communicate to your co-writer that you enjoyed yourself and would love to set up another session. If they're interested then go ahead and schedule another date. If they're not interested, be respectful of that as well.
During my retreats, I break the attendants into co-writing groups of three. Often times, these songwriters are experiencing a collaborative environment for the first time. Therefore, their co-writing etiquette needs some fine tuning. After all, it takes practice to develop these skills. I notice some of the same social flubs happening over and over again. If you commit these tools to your tool box you'll be a few steps ahead of your peers when you begin to work together. And, what's more, those peers are going to want to work with you again and again.
